How to understand/admit to yourself that you have suffered
In life, you may encounter various situations that cause people to experience deep emotions, feelings of despair, or simply make them feel bad—these negative feelings should not be ignored.
Admitting to yourself that you have suffered is definitely not a sign of weakness or something to be ashamed of. It is only the first step towards seeking and accepting help to start feeling better. Remember that the decision in criminal proceedings to recognize you as a victim is by no means a reason for you to admit to yourself that you have suffered.
Here are at least a few traumatic events that can make anyone feel bad:
- robbery
- humiliation
- rape
- beating
- death of a loved one
- car accident
- fire
- explosion
There are various negative feelings and manifestations that victims often experience after such traumatic events:
- avoiding situations, places, and other reminders—sounds, smells—that bring back memories of the event;
- severe stress or panic attacks when confronted with things that symbolize or remind them of what happened;
- re-experiencing the event repeatedly or intrusively – a so-called flashback – a burst of memories, during which you can see images and hear sounds again. The emotions are as vivid as they were at the time of the experience;
- difficulty falling asleep, staying asleep, nightmares;
- easy fatigue, headaches, high blood pressure, rapid heartbeat, various pains in the body without physical cause.
- prolonged depressed mood;
- a person may become emotionally insensitive, feeling as if they are “frozen or dead” inside;
- there is a desire to escape more often than before, using alcohol, drugs, or medication. In addition, emotions related to the experience are exacerbated when intoxicated;
- self-destructive, self-harming behavior occurs;
- a person feels threatened, fearful, confused, suspicious;
- sexual dysfunction occurs;
- eating disorders may occur;
- irritability and quick temper appear;
- difficulty concentrating;
- decreased interest in meaningful activities, sudden emotional coldness towards loved ones, desire to isolate oneself or isolation from people;
- inability to recall important aspects of the trauma;
- the aforementioned feelings and symptoms may persist for longer than 1 month.
If any of the following feelings or symptoms apply to you:
- it is possible that what happened had an extremely strong impact on you and was very difficult for you to cope with;
- it may be useful to seek advice from people who have extensive experience in providing assistance in similar cases;
At the same time, it should be noted that experiencing a traumatic event these feelings and expressions are not a prerequisite for considering yourself a victim—it is possible that you have been able to cope with your experiences in a different way, either on your own or with the support of loved ones.
Regardless of whether you identify with any of the feelings and expressions listed above, remember:
- no one has the right to subject you to traumatic events;
- if you are robbed, humiliated, raped, beaten, or otherwise abused and made to suffer, you should report what happened to the police;
- the perpetrator may be a stranger, a relative, an acquaintance, or another close person—you should not tolerate the offense, regardless of who is involved in the incident.